Mental Chaos

Some days my thought process is much like today's photos, abstract and chaotic and other days I am very level headed! All of the chaos of life in the recent weeks has worn me down and I am beginning show in physical symptoms such as cold sores and giant zits! Carma to me right? Could it be a payback from discussing my husbands ginormous zit in the blogosphere?

I really think I just need a vacation on a tropical island somewhere to relax and get my bearings but there is really no time for that at this time. Since the vacation is not an option, I would settle for a day at a spa to relax and be pampered since I am the one who is usually pampering others. You see, I am the care giver and the one people look to in order to make things better and I am pretty good at putting others at ease because I truly care for others ahead of myself but who cares for my well being when I need to recharge?

I am not allowed to be sick or tired or to take a day just for me because my responsibilities are never ending as many of you moms (and dads) can attest. Before the little one came along I would go to the spa once a month but daddy does not trust babysitters and so there are very few, OK two people that we can leave her with that he would trust and they are not always available due to the fact that they have lives too! So right now chaos is ruling my brain and that is where the photos today come from.

Photo one is done on very low light and hand held hence the blurry look but when I downloaded it, I kind of liked it because I can relate to it on a personal level! Photo number two is a macro of the same wooded roses put through some color enhancing software that made the leaves look neon which I liked because that is how my brain would look if they did a scan these days with the neon representing my synapses that are firing all the time because my brain doesn't have much time to shut down these days.

On a good note: My Father-in-law is coming home today! He is much better but still terminal! Pray that we can talk him into getting his affairs in order.

Pray for my Brother-in-law Dale who is in the hospital in Colorado. They thought he had a heart attack but have ruled that out and they still have no clue what the problem is!

As for me, life will continue on and I will keep doing what I do best, which is care for others to my own detriment! Sorry for the rambling rant but I do feel better now!