Saturday, December 5, 2009

Not Much To Say!

I know you are thinking, really? She has NOTHING to say? Alas, not much on the brain needing to come out right now! I have been in the meditative, contemplative state lately! Mostly thinking about ways to make my community better by giving to others in need! Presents for needy kids, presents for folks at one of the local nursing homes, portraits for people who cannot afford it! These are just some of the areas that have presented themselves that I have acted on but I feel the need to do more!

I know that I am NO superwoman and I cannot do it all even if I wanted to! There is just this huge, empty void that I am feeling right now and I am trying to fill it by doing! It could be just the winter blues or it could be my lack of family to share the holidays with or a combination of the two! I don't really know! This just seems to be a lonely time of year! It is made even harder by the fact the my hubby is not family oriented! By that I mean, he would rather it just be the four of us during the holidays and that is tough for me because I come from a family of gatherers! For us the holidays were a huge event that centered around great food, fun presents and lots of people all crammed into my Mom's little house! It was fun and I always looked forward to it! Now that Mom is gone, so is the tradition that I knew for the first 36 years of my life!

I know life goes on and you can create new traditions but I don't want my kids to know a tradition with no family gatherings! It sucks! OK, I am done ranting!

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